The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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