Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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