no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize