Christians are straight up FREAKS
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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