No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
