So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
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