He disabled his match.com account in front of me
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
