Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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