Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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