Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
