Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
