new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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