I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
