there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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