i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
