I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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