im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
