I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
