Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Don't EVER smell your tampon
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
