3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
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