Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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