Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
So I just went to clothing optional bar
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Randomize
