yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Everyone says I win the strip club
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
