is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
