i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
did i walk over a car last night?
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
