at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
PANTIES FOUND
Randomize
