I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
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