I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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