I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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