They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
