ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
My bed smells like the plague
Randomize