I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
