sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
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