Non-Jews are for practice
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize
