She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize