making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
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