the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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