Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
