You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
