legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
