The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
