Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
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