If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
