Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Randomize
