Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
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