do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
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