Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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