Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
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