Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize