i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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